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Post by biddyFox on Jun 26, 2015 2:42:26 GMT
CHAPTER 1: THE GROUND FALL HOLE IVY FALLS FALL ivy was the sit in a ground then the fall into more hole "aaa" said ivy in the surprise the fall hole fell and fell until the fall was too fall to fall any more ivy fell to the fall ground and fell on her face "ow" ivy said cradling her broken face suddenly an imp was punch her ivy looked up at it and it was vaporizate "ok" said ivy, now covered in blood she walked more in the cave and then there was a shiny "hi" said the shiny "what" said ivy "why are you shiny" "i'm the windy shiny" said the shiny "you're the chosen one bye" then the windy shiny went explode the windy shiny bits went across the world and landed suddenly a bird appeared in front of ivy the bird shadowed ivy due to being about the size of the eiffel tower and roared at ivy luckily ivy had a shield and slit the bird's neck with it "hfj'32q4,wpasfojasfop", said the bird ivy sat down because she was confuse then she fell out of the hole meepy walked up to her and said "meme" ivy punched him in the face and walked off
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Post by gold on Jun 26, 2015 2:47:10 GMT
what
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Post by Meepy on Jun 26, 2015 3:02:33 GMT
meme
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Post by biddyFox on Jun 26, 2015 3:05:33 GMT
CHAPTER 2: IVY GOES HOME AND APPLIES FOR A JOB suddenly ivy began walking home and went to her hometown of framgeamia some elder ran up to her and said "OMG IVY U R THE CHOSEN ONE" ivy was like "who the fuck are you and how can you tell" the elder pointed out a strange symbol on ivy's forehead that looked kinda like this "wtf" said ivy "THATS THE MARK OF THE CHOSEN ONE" said the dumb elder dude "COME WITH ME" the elder dragged ivy over to his house and showed her a pool "yes thats a very nice pool now wtf did you bring me here for" a ~)~*~MAGICAL SCROLL~*~(~ floated out of the water it was all soggy and the ink was smudged "GOD DAMMIT" said the elder a bright light flashed as the elder cast a holy spell, and the ink became unsmudged "thats the only magic i know", said the elder seemingly proudly as he faced towards ivy the ~)~*~MAGICAL SCROLL~*~(~ had a list of generic fantasy classes on it "fighter, thief, dark wizard, cleric, sorceror, mimic! those are the really cool jobs" said the elder "pick one or i stab you" "why" said ivy "you're the chosen one", said the elder, removing a knife from his back pocket "now pick a fucking job" ivy considered the classes. which one to choose.
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Post by biddyFox on Jun 26, 2015 4:12:51 GMT
CHAPTER 2.5: IVY PICKS ANOTHER KIND OF JOB "what are the not really cool jobs," said ivy "well there is barbarian, chemist, scholar, and onion" said the elder ivy cringes. "what the fuck is an onion" the elder gave ivy a strange blank stare "the worst class"
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Post by biddyFox on Jun 26, 2015 5:18:12 GMT
CHAPTER 3: IVY THE ONION "i'll be an onion," said ivy the elder stood stunned. "WHATHeh8dysuogbfsucidasod" he suddenly stopped. his entire face became blank, and he fell down on the ground. ivy checked his body. he was the dead; ivy stood up. suddenly, the police broke in."YOU KILLED THAT DUDE" "what?!" ivy said. a battle engaged. the three police stood in a line in front of ivy, and ivy jumped back. ivy suddenly felt a painful tingling on her skin. there was a flash, and ivy's outfit had changed! she suddenly was wearing overalls, a t-shirt, and a knight hat: the uniform of an onion. ivy suddenly felt hindered, and weak. one of the police hit ivy with a baton. ivy tried to punch him, but ended up hurting herself. "aagh" said ivy. she kicked the dude. he took minimal damage. the guy beat her up with a baton. ivy kicked him in the crotch and stole his baton. she bust his head in with the baton, then hit some other people with the baton. the battle was won. "augh!" said the police! "curse our collective brittle bone syndrome!" they shouted, then ran away. ivy left the elder's house, and decided to shop. she noticed an item shop, an armor shop, a weapon shop, a grocery store, a hotel, a laundromat, and a video game store.. ivy entered the weapon shop. "oh hi the chosen one" said the shopkeep "how many swords are you buying" ivy walked up to him and asked "what weapons do an onion use" the shopkeep gagged. "the chosen one is an onion?! we're all doomed!" he handed ivy a sword that appeared to be made of some kind of vegetable and shoved her out.
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Post by ♪ Ivy Kisaragi on Jun 26, 2015 11:23:00 GMT
> meepy walked up to her and said "meme" ivy punched him in the face and walked off
ivy.txt
> some elder ran up to her and said "OMG IVY U R THE CHOSEN ONE" ivy was like "who the fuck are you and how can you tell" > ivy cringes. "what the fuck is an onion"
this is me
fuck you all you made me an onion i should have been a cleric
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Post by TheShinyMudkipz on Jun 26, 2015 17:31:30 GMT
Exploding Shiny... Dats nice.
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Post by biddyFox on Jun 28, 2015 1:23:26 GMT
CHAPTER 4: RANDOM ENCOUNTERS ivy walked out of the town and suddenly an imp was there. "heyyy" said the imp in a sad tone ivy prepared her carrot sword. the imp started smoking from a hookah. "what the hell are you" said ivy "a random encounter" said the imp "now will you kindly take your turn" ivy looked at the imp. "what the fuck is a turn" the imp continued to smoke from a hookah. ivy hit him in the back of the neck with the cabbage blade. suddenly, ivy was unable to move. the imp took a kick at ivy. the kick brushed against ivy's leg. ivy keeled over in pain. a number five fell from the sky and hit ivy in the head, causing a number one to fall from the sky, and hit ivy in the head, causing another number one to fall from the sky and hit ivy in the head over and over again until ivy was under the effect of several concussions. "fahhckuh yaeu ann all yoo fwends..." babbled ivy. her head was bleeding. the imp pushed her, and ivy felt herself on the brink of death. ivy ran away, or as much as one can while under the effect of several concussions. luckily she got back into the town and went to the laundromat to recover her life. "welcome to the laundromat. are you planning on staying?" said the laundromat-keeper. ivy vomited blood onto the counter. "i'lll take that as a yes," the laundromat-keeper said, walking into the office.
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Post by biddyFox on Jul 9, 2015 0:37:30 GMT
CHAPTER 5: BID FIGURES OUT HOW TO USE THE SHIFT KEY Ivy woke up. She was in a bed. Her head was pounding. The girl got up out of the bed. The bed was covered in blood. "Auckahguh.", said Ivy, crimson ichor pouring out of her ears. "What the fuck happened last night" The girl walked out of her room. Suddenly, the laundromat-keeper ran up to her! She was holding a machine gun. "What the fuck. How did you get that." said Ivy. "Pay yer fee~!" said the laundromat-keeper, with a psychotic grin on her face. She pushed the machine gun forward, her finger on the trigger. "Ghwat" said Ivy. A battle started. Ivy was frozen. The laundromat-keeper attacked Ivy, and a number five appeared over her head. Ivy hit the keeper with her zucchini scimitar and she was knocked back. A number two appeared over her head. Somehow the Onion managed to attack the laundromat-keeper a second time with her radish foil. The keeper cast a spell! "Mind Blast!" screamed the scary lady. Ivy's head pained again, and more gore flew out of her ears. She couldn't move! Attacked again and again, she could do nothing but take it. The keeper walked back and shouted "Roulette!" The laundromat-keeper suddenly fell down, dead. Ivy walked out of the laundromat, stepping on the laundromat-keeper on the way.
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Post by Alphonso on Jan 25, 2021 6:11:48 GMT
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